Signs Of An Unhealthy Relationship

At times all relationships will have some of the characteristics listed below. However, unhealthy relationships will exhibit these characteristics more frequently and cause you stress and pressure that is hard to avoid. This tension is unhealthy for both members of the relationship and may lead to problems in other areas of your life.

While in an unhealthy relationship you:

• Put one person before the other by neglecting yourself or your partner
• Feel pressure to change who you are for the other person
• Feel worried when you disagree with the other person
• Feel pressure to quit activities you usually/used to enjoy
• Pressure the other person into agreeing with you or changing to suit you better
• Notice one of you has to justify your actions (e.g., where you go, who you see)
• Notice one partner feels obligated to have sex or has been forced
• Have a lack of privacy, and may be forced to share everything with the other person
• You or your partner refuse to use safer sex methods
• Notice arguments are not settled fairly
• Experience yelling or physical violence during an argument
• Attempt to control or manipulate each other
• Notice your partner attempts to controls how you dress and criticizes your behaviors
• Do not make time to spend with one another
• Have no common friends, or have a lack of respect for each others’ friends and family
• Notice an unequal control of resources (e.g., food, money, home, car, etc.)
• Experience a lack of fairness and equality

If some of your relationships have some of these characteristics it does not necessarily mean the end of that relationship. By recognizing how these characteristics affect you, you can begin to work on improving the negative aspect of your relationships to benefit both of you.